The terrible, horrible, no good, very bad food day

I want to eat healthy. Not so that I can become skinny and gorgeous, no. I want to feel healthy, I want a healthy body and I want to feel fit and clean inside and out.

Sometimes I feel like my body wants to sabotage itself. I crave foods that I know will cause me problems, not just foods that I know are bad for me. Thursday night I ate out twice and I ate really oily food really late at night. My intestines have been in excruciating pain ever since. When I eat sugar, I experience painful migraines, but today I ate about 100g of it (which is 5x the amount you’re supposed to have) because I had a huge craving I couldn’t say no to.

Why do these things happen? I don’t understand why I can’t turn down food that I know will hurt me. The problem is not that I can’t stop myself from eating food I know is bad for me, I understand why that happens. But why can’t I stop myself from eating food that causes me excruciating pain after I eat it? I suffer for days, and yet I still eat the food.

Sometimes I feel like I will never be healthy. I don’t care if I have the sexiest body around, I just want to know that I won’t have to depend on medicine to keep me alive (more than I already do with my nut allergy) or that I’ll have to depend on heavy medicare to keep living. I just want to be healthy and I want to make and keep goals that will help me get healthy. I’m good at keeping them for a time, but then I get sick from eating and I get incredibly discouraged and feel like I will never get healthy again.

I need a little encouragement here. What do you do on days where you feel like you messed up so bad that you can’t keep going?


One thought on “The terrible, horrible, no good, very bad food day

  1. Just know that each meal is a new chance to start over! Don’t let one bad or unhealthy choice determine the rest of your day/week/month. It is REALLY hard to start out eating healthier, but it can be done. I used to be a huge sweets person. Now? I don’t even eat dessert 90% of the time after dinner. I feel like something that has helped me is knowing that people use food as an emotional tool- it is an addiction. We turn to it when we are happy/sad because it makes us feel better, but only for the moment. If you are feeling overwhelmed by starting a healthy lifestyle, try just cutting out things a little at a time so you aren’t making so many changes at once- you are more likely to stick to them if you incorporate healthy choices slowly. i.e., focus on drinking more water this week, next week, focus on filling half your plate with healthy greens, the next week focus on getting in 3 days of exercise, and just build from there. It takes time. Please don’t beat yourself up about a bad food choice! It makes it so much worse! What’s done is done and you just have to focus on making good choices. Bad food choices or missing a work out are inevitable, and it’s okay. What’s important is you are making this a priority in your life and you will get there! :)

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