Worry Wart

I worry.

A lot.

Most recently, I’m worried about what I’m going to do after I graduate college. Sure, I only have one year left, but right now the experience I have is for jobs I don’t want.

I don’t know how many people experience this. But I am terrified of working in a job I hate. I mean, I’ve only held down my current job for so long because I have extended periods of time where I don’t work. Without that, I might have quit a while ago.

I mean, I know I need a job where I can do something different all the time and not sit all day. I know that’s what is best for my mental and physical help. But the more I look, the more I feel like this is impossible. At least, with my experience and background.

Honestly, if I knew I could reach my dream and be financially secure, I would likely have never gone to college. But I’ve grown into a much better, knowledgeable, informed and intelligent person by going to Westminster and sticking with it. I doubt I would have stumbled upon slam poetry without it and right now, sharing poetry with others is important to me. Ideally, the dream is to have a career as an author and make enough money off of it that Jacob and I don’t have to work and we can travel or stay home as we see fit. But with how often I know that sort of thing doesn’t work for people, I prepared for the worst. Now I’m concerned that I can’t find a job that will meet all of my needs:

-A job that gives me enough energy and free time leftover to take care of myself and to write

-One that doesn’t require me to compromise my physical or mental health

-One that will pay the bills enough so Jacob can go back to school

It almost feels like a tall order, especially because I know some people can’t find any job after college, let alone one they love.

But I still have a year left. I can’t let this get to me.

Not yet.

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