The past few months I’ve been suspiciously absent. School took a lot of my energies, especially right near the end. And then for most of last month, I was out of the country experiencing a world much different than my own.
But now I’m graduated and now I’ve got much more time on my hands. Many have asked what’s next, but right now I’m not concerned too much about that. While I was in Thailand, I learned the joy of living in what’s happening now, what am I doing here and now and how can I find the joy in that.
I have never heard anyone say they wish they had gone straight into a job from college, or that they had started working earlier. Rather, I more often hear that they wish they had taken time to do things they had never done before, or go places they don’t think they can go now because of the situation they’re in. I don’t want to get old and have a life full of regrets. Even if that means fighting against the status quo or constantly explaining why my life doesn’t look like the ones of those around me, I am willing to go through that.
Right now, I am working on me. I am getting healthy, both physically and mentally, and I am not letting others make my decisions for me. I will work when the time is right. In fact, I am working some at the moment, no more than around 20 hours a week. Even then, if I decided not to work and made sure everything was taken care of, no one can tell me that is any less valid than working.
For now, I am impressed to begin writing again. It will take some time before it gets any sort of major recognition, but I am alright with this. As long as I am doing what I need to make myself better, to further myself and my goals, all is well.
So for those who still insist on knowing what’s next, I say “wherever my writing takes me.” Because right now, it is the most important thing for me to pursue.